Liz, Area Contact Volunteer
My name is Liz. I joined WAY after my husband MJ died at the start of lockdown. MJ and I had been together for 25 years, married for 20. He was my best friend.
In summer 2017, MJ found a lump in his thigh. It was a sarcoma. It grew rapidly, and despite radiotherapy and surgery, by spring 2018, it had already spread to his lungs. He carried on working full time, took up cycling and did spin classes – although he looked strong outwardly, inside, the cancer was spreading. By January 2020, it had reached his heart. There was a sudden downturn in energy, and we lost him in April that year, just as the first lockdown was announced. He was only 48.
When the funeral director offered me May the 4th as the date of MJ’s funeral, I bit their hand off – MJ was a huge Star Wars fan. It was meant to be. Only ten guests were allowed, and his best friend – a pastor – led the service. It was private, low-key, just how MJ would have wanted it.
Once the funeral was over, I was invited to a Zoom bereavement group, but it wasn’t for me – it was mostly older people mourning spouses of a different generation. I just couldn’t relate. I genuinely can’t remember how I heard about WAY Widowed and Young – maybe through the funeral service or the Zoom group. But it changed everything. I met up with another new member for drinks – we got on so well. We shared our stories and ended up staying out for dinner.
WAY was and is an absolute lifeline. I’m a very positive person and try to take all the opportunities that come my way, especially after everything that has happened. I always like to give back, and now I help welcome new members, show them what WAY is all about, and encourage them to come along to meet ups.
WAY really is the club no one wants to join – but it’s a way of supporting each other through tough times. As an Area Contact for my local area in Kent, I love to bring people together and watch connections grow. Members have gone on to form special friendships and subgroups have formed according to interests, which is brilliant. We all come together for larger events.
There’s no handbook, no set timeline. We’re all unique, and so are our situations. Volunteering is a great way to give back and help others – especially those who are shy or struggling to get involved. If I can help someone feel less alone, then it’s worth it.