Transgender Awareness Week: Tips on supporting someone trans and widowed
November 2024
Griffyn has volunteered for WAY since 2023, kindly offering his time and experience to support the charity as a member of our LGBTQIA+ Diversity Working Group. Here are his tips on how to support someone who’s trans and widowed…
- When leading introductions at a WAY Zoom or meet up, encourage participants to share their pronouns as well as their name, if they feel comfortable doing so. This helps trans members feel less pressure around sharing their own pronouns.
- It’s better to ask than assume! If someone is sharing something about their own gender identity or their later partner’s and there’s something you don’t understand, it’s better to ask – if the person feels comfortable explaining more. Staying quiet or trying to change the topic can come across as being uncomfortable or unsupportive. Of course, if the person isn’t comfortable explaining, then that’s a good opportunity for you to do a little research on your own so you can understand better in the future.
- If someone has shared privately that they or their partner is/was trans, don’t share that publicly (or ‘out them’).
- A transgender person who has lost their partner might not have many other people to talk with any more about their identity and experiences. If you feel comfortable doing so, let them know you’d welcome being a supportive listening ear if they’d ever like to share more about their journey. They might have plans for legal appointments, medical treatments or surgeries that they now have no one to go with (some are scheduled years in advance!) If you’ve met someone in this situation, see what you can do to organise some support at appointments, bringing them meals and helping around the house after surgery, etc.
- Take a moment this Transgender Awareness Week to do a bit of your own research into some of the joys and difficulties people in the trans community face! You might want to start with an opinion piece/news article or podcast by a trans person (not a commentary by a cisgender person). No single experience speaks for everyone, but we are the experts on being us!
- You might also want to look up resources for young trans people. Widows with children might find themselves with less support than they’d like if their child comes out as trans. Having some resources at the ready can be a big help to both the parent and child!
Griffyn has shared some useful resources for people who want to find out more:
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